My tip this week is to
Put yourself in your teen’s shoes >>Listen

A recent survey of teenagers says that 85% of them claim to be stressed, and their primary source of stress is school. I know a few adults who tend not to have much empathy for teenagers’ stress, given the problems many parents face right now.

There are two things you need to know about this: First teenagers lack a sense of perspective and history. You have already survived numerous recessions, challenges, tragedies even. You have failed at some things, succeeded in others…and you know either way, things have a way of working out. You’ll survive. Your teenager doesn’t quite get this. There is no way he can have the sense of perspective that you do because he simply hasn’t been on the planet long enough! Teens often overreact, and they do get stressed out, and some of this is because of their developmental stage and their lack of experience and perspective. It helps for you to understand that.

As far as school stress goes… put yourself in your teen’s shoes here, too. School is to a teenager what your job is to you. It’s big. In fact, school is your teen’s primary job, isn’t it? And, from your teenager’s point of view “school” covers a lot of ground. Academics is only one piece of it. There are expectations that vary from teacher to teacher, there is the cute boy who is a big distraction in class, there are the social interactions in the lunchroom and hall, misunderstandings between friends, the party invitations going out for this weekend, and there are team tryouts and extra curriculars… each and every one of these areas is big to your teenager. This is her life!

So they do feel stress. Don’t diminish his feelings because they don’t compare to the burdens you may bear. Put yourself in your teen’s shoes, show her some respect and empathy, help to provide some guidance and try to lighten things up.

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Til next time…I'm Sue Blaney.