Hi – Sue Blaney here with your Parenting Tip from Parenting Teens Info.com

My tip this week is a
Listening Guideline…Here’s the 70% Solution >>Listen

I have a helpful guideline for you when it comes to listening and finding areas of compromise with your teenager. I call it the 70% solution. It says: “If you and your teen’s effort toward a common goal equals 100%, you need to be prepared to make 70% of the effort.”

The 70% solution provides a concrete guideline that emphasizes the fact that you’re the one in the best position to offer compromises, and to find the way for you and your teen to have a meeting of the minds. When you interact with other adults you may expect this division of labor to be closer to 50/50…and that may well be appropriate. But when you are dealing with your teen, you must remember you’re the adult…and he’s a kid. Even if he’s 18… the newest research says he won’t be fully developed until he’s 23 – 25!

You can apply the 70% solution in many ways. It asks you to listen more closely and to respond more carefully. If your teenager is tired or crabby, remember to give her a break and meet her more than half-way. It suggests that you may be the one to create a compromise; it asks that you give your teen more leeway when it comes to mood swings and attitudes. Please note that it doesn’t ask that you compromise on the non-negotiable rules and expectations that are at the core of your teenager’s best interests.

Remember the 70% solution…this simple guideline can keep you focused on keeping the peace, and remembering what’s most important.

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Til next time…I'm Sue Blaney.